The Benefits of Challenging Oneself and Embracing Discomfort
The toughest season for me isn’t winter, but rather stick season (the late fall in Vermont, made famous by the vocalist Noah Kahan from Vermont.) A time when it’s dark, raw, and tougher to be outside. Too cold for biking, but no snow for skiing, often low 40s and drizzly. To bring a little energy to this time of year, I came up with a random challenge for myself to hike Mt. Wantastiquet in Brattleboro each Sunday morning from 6:30-8:30 from November 12- December 17th and invited folks to join. I had no idea if anyone would want to come, but to my utter surprise, 23 people joined in either one or all of these hikes! Sure, it’s hard to get up at 5:30 a.m. in order to meet at the dark trailhead, but what I’ve learned over the years, as I’m sure you have, too, is that doing hard or uncomfortable things creates a lot of satisfaction. Unfortunately, as humans, we’re hard-wired toward taking the easy way out in order to conserve calories and stay safe, but today that doesn’t serve those of us with a comfortable life, and we can actually benefit by putting some intentional discomfort into our days.
I love this alleged advertisement by Sir Earnest Shackleton, an 18th century explorer who sought to cross Antarctica from sea to sea, via the south pole; and became one of the most famous adventure stories ever. It brought in more than 5,000 inquiries from men clamoring to take their chances on the icy southern continent. It taps into the notion of some primal human need to challenge oneself.
In the book The Comfort Crisis: Embrace Discomfort to Reclaim Your Wild, Happy, Healthy Self, author Michael Easter explores the idea that modern comforts and conveniences have made our lives easier but have also disconnected us from our primal instincts and natural resilience. The book encourages readers to embrace discomfort in various forms, such as exposing themselves to cold, engaging in physical challenges, and spending time in nature. By doing so, Easter argues that people can reconnect with their true selves, improve their mental and physical well-being, and find greater happiness and fulfillment.
What I appreciate most is the mindset to embrace discomfort rather than to just endure it. We can build resilience by exposing ourselves, and mindfully turning our attention to it. (Note: in this case I’m not talking about traumatic events here.)
Here are a few domains to consider:
Physical discomfort- We know that in exercise, we get stronger by taxing our muscles rather than keeping the status quo, and exposing ourselves to cold water at the end of a hot shower, though uncomfortable, has many health benefits. Lots of opportunities to practice discomfort.
Boredom- Boredom is a desire for desire. Unfortunately, “Boredom died on June 29, 2007” the date the iPhone went on the market. There is a concept that we have two modes: focused mode, which requires energy, and unfocused mode, which is a necessary resting state where our mind relaxes and wanders. Lack of boredom can cause mental fatigue-- we actually need boredom to be more psychologically robust and resilient.
Silence- Silence has therapeutic and notable health benefits (especially in nature). All religions have some practice of silence, and the medical field and business worlds are touting the benefits. Yet the draw of throwing in earbuds to listen to the many podcasts, audio books, and music in every moment makes it harder to do without specific intention.
Hunger - While food insecurity in the United States is a real thing, there is a larger epidemic of too many of us never feeling hungry. There is a discomfort with hunger, but with food accessible at every turn (in the 1970s gas stations sold gas, not a whole store of junk food), one needs to be mindful not to eat constantly. Our ancestors had times of fasting and hunger, and research suggests that our bodies are designed to benefit from a break from food.
Mental and emotional discomfort- Life is filled with setbacks and challenges, such as job loss, illness or death of a loved one. How we deal with these challenges helps us to build resilience to keep going and cope with what has happened. We can choose to face the discomfort, rather than numbing out through alcohol, technology, or other distractions.
Death and discomfort- Studies show that thinking about death more often allows us to appreciate and find positive things to focus on and makes us happier. Stoics, Buddhists and other spiritual traditions all invite us to face death as a way to live more fully, unpleasant as it may be.
Stoic philosophy encourages embracing discomfort in order to truly appreciate the good things we do have. A warm home is more enjoyable coming in from the cold. Food tastes better if you’re hungry. Actively contemplating the death of our loved ones as an exercise helps us appreciate them more.
This month I’ve decided on two practices of discomfort. Small shifts, but I’m curious about the impact. First, I’m going to push my morning coffee back an hour, a little delayed gratification that I think will actually sit better with my stomach. And secondly, I’m going to go for my runs in the woods without earbuds. Let me return to the silence of the forest.
Great Link
Get Comfortable on Being Uncomfortable- Speaking your truths TED talk (10:54)
Reflection Exercise: Moving from Theory to Action
To support you in practicing discomfort, here are some questions to consider:
Is there an area where you want to experience a little discomfort? (For example, you like being outdoors, but tend to shy away when it rains).
Is there a new mindset or framing you could try on? (For example, walking in the rain is another way I get to experience nature, and typically I enjoy all my walks outside.)
Are there any preparations or behavior substitutions to make? (For example, getting a waterproof jacket and/or adjusting your walks to the woods for more tree cover when it rains, making the walks shorter, or even see what it’s like just to get wet!)
Is there anyone who can support you? What would that support look like? (For example, have a friend join you, or have an accountability buddy and you text them after you return from your walk).
Quarterly Quote
The only way to grow is to embrace discomfort and seek challenges.
- Vivek Ramaswamy
Book Review
Endurance: Shackleton's Incredible Voyage
by Alfred Lansing
As a former sailor, this is one of my husband’s favorite books, he recommended it when we were dating, and I passed the test since I thoroughly enjoyed it. Indeed, it’s a must read if you like to read stories of grit and facing adversity. This is the gripping account of Ernest Shackleton's ill-fated expedition to Antarctica and the incredible story of survival and leadership that followed. In fact, there have been many articles and books analyzing his incredible leadership skills under adversity and how he created a cohesive team when things could have turned to something like Lord of the Flies. It’s an inspiring book to remind you of what humans can endure.